Finding Your Best Self

Per my weekday morning ritual, I was reading The Washington Post today over a cup of tea (or two). I like to get through at least the A-Section before stretching and starting my day. Today, I paused after reading Michele Norris’ OPED, Our children are watching us closely now. A phrase towards the end of this piece struck a chord, “…find that best version of yourself…”

How does one do that? How does one find your best self?

For some it seems so apparent, so easy. For others, they are still sitting at the kitchen table wondering, head-in-hands, confused by the question or walking away to ponder it another day. But for me, this line of questioning led to an internal series of thoughts, from finding myself, knowing myself, defining myself; to moments that defined me, and choices I made and didn’t make along the way.  

Finding your best self implies a certain level of self-understanding, an ability to stand tall and announce with conviction what it is you believe. It’s not about religion or spirituality or politics. I am talking about fundamental behavior – the way you engage with the world – what you say, how you say it, and what you mean by it. Perhaps that is what enables one to more easily “find that best version of yourself.” Perhaps when you have spent time clarifying what you believe, you are more apt to live from that place; you know who you are, and people can clearly see you.

What you say. How you say it. What you mean by it.

The exercise of clarifying beliefs may seem slow and frustrating, or maybe unnecessary but please realize, like other life lessons, it is a fundamental journey. A grounding exercise. A life-changing, life-revealing moment. Writing them down makes them real and in making them real, you must explore:

1.       What am I truly committed to?  

2.       How do I demonstrate these in daily interactions?

3.       What happens when beliefs, words and actions don’t align?

What I’m really referring to here are Personal Values and their related actions and behaviors. Through the process of articulating your values, you unlock insights into your motivations, relationships and interactions with others thus making it easier in turbulent times to find your balance and stay true to who you are.

So, what are you waiting for? What are your values? How are you demonstrating them to the world, each day, each moment? Remember, as Ms. Norris says in her editorial, our children are watching.